Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
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