I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Randomize
