I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
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