I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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