I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
