Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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