I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
The beer is more important than you right now.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
