that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
The air taste purple.
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