My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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