I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize