I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
