he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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