In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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