I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Vodka?
Forever.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
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