Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
