I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
