apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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