She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Randomize
