i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
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