and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
