What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I fill condoms, not promises.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
