so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
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