my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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