How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize