i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
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