Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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