i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
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