A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Randomize
