I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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