She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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