i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I just found puke in my bra..
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
