Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize
