Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Randomize
