well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
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