I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize