if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I have fence marks all over my body
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
