what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
