this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
