My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
