Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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