'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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