I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
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