You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
the liver wants what the liver wants
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize