don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
You tried to impress her by kicking the 5th floor button in the elevator, but you ended up kicking everything from 3 to 11. Then you said, "pretty accurate, huh ladies?"
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
