Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
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