Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
