I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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