I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize