Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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