If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
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