Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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